09/25/2021
Marriage, it is more than a simple ceremony, it is a Holy covenant that was first established between Adam and Eve in Genesis, continues throughout scripture as the model for all men and women to follow, and is the same covenant by which we see Jesus coming to claim His Church in the book of Revelation. When we marry we are entering into this covenant before God, and for us it is meant to be a lifelong promise of love, respect, and the creation of a new creature as we become one flesh. Each time we witness a marriage it is not only the establishment of a promise between those two people, but a reminder to all of us who have made this pledge, of the covenant we entered into with our own spouses. For every Christian it is also a very real reminder of the coming Christ. How healthy are our marriages? How true are we to our covenant?
“Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh. And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.”
Genesis 2:24-25 KJV
My wife and I attended a wedding ceremony yesterday evening. The bride was the daughter of good friends, and we celebrated this union with them, but the interesting thing is that although it had been 45 years since Ann and I took those same vows, and made the same covenant with one another before God, our wedding day, and those promises we made, became fresh once more in our minds… and in the minds of every married couple attending. I know this to be true because as we sat at dinner with one another the conversation included the remembrances of our own weddings and early days of marriage. We are meant to become something new when we make covenant with one another, not just for the moment, or a few years, but for life itself. In marriage we should fall back on scripture which reminds us of our promise. Listen as Isaiah speaks of forgetting who we were, and remembering the new… trusting in God to see us through:
““Remember not the former things, nor consider the things of old. Behold, I am doing a new thing; now it springs forth, do you not perceive it? I will make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert.”
Isaiah 43:18-19 ESV
Jesus makes it clear to us in the establishment of communion that we are to remember always..
“And he took bread, and when he had given thanks, he broke it and gave it to them, saying, “This is my body, which is given for you. Do this in remembrance of me.” And likewise the cup after they had eaten, saying, “This cup that is poured out for you is the new covenant in my blood.”
Luke 22:19-20 ESV
Peter the Apostle spoke of remembering by reminder…
“Therefore I intend always to remind you of these qualities, though you know them and are established in the truth that you have.”
2 Peter 1:12 ESV
And, Paul spoke of how we should keep our promises, our covenants, fresh in our minds in writing these words of encouragement…
“Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.”
Philippians 4:8 ESV
So as I remember last night’s wedding, and my own, I would like to offer this to those who are entering into this covenant with one another. Marriage has three stages, first comes Holy, it is the phase in which we stand before God and make a lifelong covenant, the second is excitement which is the living out of that solemn promise each and every day, and the third is anticipation as we look forward to what comes tomorrow, what happens next in the life we now share.
In the Holy moment in which you make covenant with one another, think about how you are committing to becoming one, not for just a day, week, or year, but a lifetime. Don’t trivialize this because your life as one is going to be hard, and there will be many challenges. Only by leaning on God, respecting and loving one another, forgiving, and remembering this moment of commitment every day, will you be able to live out your promise. Remember how scripture tells us that for God to forgive us we must forgive others? Well marriage is the same. How can we expect Jesus to return and become one with us if we can’t establish and remain one with each other? Love, respect, remember, and Forgive…
“For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you, but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.”
Matthew 6:14-15 ESV
Then, and only then, comes the excitement of being one in flesh, and spirit. If you forgive always, and maintain your Holy love and respect for one another, then your lives will be exciting indeed. Every day will be new, and filled with unforeseen experiences. Some will be good, others not so good, and a few will be downright bad, but together with God you can weather every storm, and live through the rough places in your relationship. In the end you will find yourselves deeper in love, and more committed to one another. Excitement is not always good, but for those who love the Lord they are made to be.
“And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.”
Romans 8:28 ESV
Finally, there comes the anticipation. Just as we each anticipate the coming of Jesus to claim His bride you are meant to anticipate your lives together. You look forward to the wedding night, future children, a family you will establish, great loves that are yet to be realized, every dream of what life might be together, and where it will take you, the doubts and dreads of hardship, the mourning of losses in which you will comfort one another, and all the ages of life that will amaze you as the years pass by, and God willing, you grow old together. All this is made possible through the exercise of daily faith, love, respect, and forgiveness.
“The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life and have it abundantly.”
John 10:10 ESV
In each of these stages God gives us abundant life, but never forget the importance of forgiveness, because not being able to forgive steals your Holy commitment, excitement in life, and your future. Not forgiving is like a thief that comes in the night, and in marriage this thief can steal not just your individual moments, or your immediate happiness, but your very life as one.
So I have given council to the newly married and those who are considering marriage, but there is advice for those in the midst of marriage as well; continue to do these things that have brought you this far; have faith in God, love one another, respect each other, and always forgive, but do one more thing… make the most of every opportunity to remember the covenant you have made. Never trivialize the Holy promise you have made… it is forever.
““Again you have heard that it was said to those of old, ‘You shall not swear falsely, but shall perform to the Lord what you have sworn.’”
Matthew 5:33 ESV
Prayer:
Father, thank you for establishing marriage at the moment when Eve was created from the rib of Adam. Thank you for continuing to this day the practice of man and woman making covenant with one another, and becoming one flesh. Father we look forward to the day when Jesus comes to claim the Church, His bride, and we anticipate in faith, prayer, and deed, that day of His coming. Help us to forgive, and be true to the covenant we make in establishing our own marriages, and forgive us as we forgive one another. Holy, Holy, Holy, are you our God who loves us, is true to your covenants and promises, and forgives us our sins. Praised be your name for the Holy, the excitement, and the anticipation within our earthly marriages, but praise you more for the spiritual manifestation of these things as they are part of the marriage Christ Jesus, and eternal in their nature. Wash us clean in the blood of Christ, and judge us worthy to sit at your table forevermore. Bless our marriages Father, here on earth as we live them out, and in Heaven as we anticipate the coming of your Son Jesus.
“Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, because we are members of his body. “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.”
Ephesians 5:25-33 ESV
Rich Forbes